"Yikes! Who let those idiots near a computer?" - Morton J. Paulinskill Your complete online guide to our stupid pretend band! Here's the frightening menu of options: Check out the entire glorious band history! Thrill to every excruciating detail in the story of the least influential, least talked-about band ever! Don't miss any of our upcoming live shows! You'll want to be able to tell your friends that you were there! Because trust us, they won't be! This is your big opportunity to hear some classic SAF songs, right there on your computer! Includes our new single, Greg Brady Wants Me Dead! It took us 10 years, but we've finally released another recording. Our aptly-titled, greatest-hits CD, Delusions of Competence is being enjoyed by packs of angry squirrels across the land. Why don't you join in the fun? You don't have to carry all those photos of us in your wallet anymore! They're right here in the SAF photo album! Not Your Nightmare is Kevin's weird little small press magazine. He releases a new issue every nine years, unless he sees his shadow. But now it's here, online, for you! Want to write to us? Send stuff to us? Order stuff from us? Join our email list? Want to just be sure to avoid us? Here is all the contact information you will need! As long as you're wasting your life away on the stupid Internet, here are some links to other sites that you will enjoy much more than this one.   The Sponge Awareness Foundation: (left) Kevin Eldridge (vocalist, lyricist, Spam juggler, and he has the attention span of a guppy) and (right) Ed Lecuyer (keyboardist, composer, guy who understands how all this computer stuff works, and he just found out who Vivian Vance is). (He doesn't get out much.) This web site, the artwork and photographs, and audio clips are © Copyright 1998 - 2006 Edgar C. Lecuyer and Kevin Eldridge, All Rights Reserved. Thank you. Last Updated: November 2, 2006